We are the wreckless, we are the wild youth chasing visions of our future.

As 2012 comes to a close, I'm sat in my bedroom at my parents house wondering how the hell I've ended up exactly where I am right now; when I entered 2012, I was in Oxford with my best friend, her boyfriend, a very cute boy and 10 other strangers. I wasn't drunk but at 2am, I did cocaine with previously mentioned cute boy and fell asleep half naked in his Smurfs t-shirt. I was in a strange house and it was my first New Years without my family around me but I think, just maybe, I entered 2012 with a bang. I had no expectations for the year ahead which was a first for me and when somebody asked me what I wanted to get from the next 12 months, I think I answered with "ridiculously drunk". Wow.

Despite sticking to my word and spending the majority of the past 12 months absolutely hammered, I've made some pretty awesome memories:
Moving to London, experiencing my first taste of being on a 'press list' and absolutely loving in, seeing amazing musicians perform live, being involved in such a beautiful team with IAmMusic.tv, the ups and downs of relationships, meeting somebody who changed my outlook on love entirely, watching my writing escalate and finally understanding just why I love it so much, seeing one of my close friends embrace motherhood and watching her baby grow into the most beautiful, innocent little person ever, appreciating my passion and learning how to use it properly, falling in love with London's transport system, watching my relationship with my Mum flourish, having my own house with the best housemates I could have possibly wished for, spending the night on the sofa of an ex 'pop-star' off my face and talking about music and politics, days wasted in bed next to somebody I really love (even now, in the bitter aftermath), exploring London, V Festival, Play it Forward, waking up in a friend's bed with a dry mouth and no memory of the night before, Boris Bikes, breakfast in Clapham South, realising who is worth my time and effort, getting to grips with every single lesson I've learnt in 2012 and attempting to take notes along the way. It's been a busy year.

I've also met some AMAZING people, individuals who I can't even begin to write about because there's too much to say but I'm certain they know who they are...
I should also point out that only a number of people I've met in previous years have remained through to 2012 and it's those people who I'm truly grateful for. They've known me long enough to understand my flaws and they've accepted me for them which is something only great people are capable of.

I've had one of the loveliest, most stressful, inspiring, busiest, eye-opening years I've had yet and when I reflect upon the last 12 months, nothing but a smile comes to my face. I have a lot of expectations riding on 2013 because I'm determined to make it something extraordinary but right now, I wish nothing but a kick ass New Years Eve for everyone and a lot of happiness, laughter, love and wisdom to be carried through to 2013.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

We'll fast forward to a few years later & no one knows except the both of us...

If it weren't for your maturity, none of this would have happened. If you weren't so wise beyond your years, I would have been able to control myself. If it weren't for my attention, you wouldn't have been successful and if it weren't for me, you would never have amounted to very much.

This could be messy but you don't seem to mind. Don't go telling everybody and overlook this supposed crime. We'll fast forward to a few years later and no-one knows except the both of us and I'll have honoured your request for silence and you've washed your hands clean of this.

You're essentially an employee and I like you having to depend on me. You're kind of my protege and one day you'll say you learned all you know from me. I know you depend on me like a young thing would to a guardian. I know you sexualise me like a young thing would and I think I like it.

What part of our history's reinvented and under rug swept? What part of your memory if selective and tends to forget? What with this distance it seems so obvious? This could be messy but you don't seem to mind. Don't go telling everybody and overlook this supposed crime. We'll fast forward to a few years later and no-one knows except the both of us and I'll have honoured your request for silence and you've washed your hands clean of this.

Just make sure you don't tell on me especially to members of your family. We best keep this to ourselves and not tell any members of our inner posse. I wish I could tell the world 'cause you're such a pretty thing when you're done up properly. I might want to marry you one day if you watch your weight and keep your firm body.

This could be messy but you don't seem to mind. Don't go telling everybody and overlook this supposed crime. We'll fast forward to a few years later and no-one knows except the both of us and I'll have honoured your request for silence and you've washed your hands clean of this.