Monday, 19 March 2012


This morning, one of my close friends tagged me in this photo on Facebook. It's a list of an alternative five-a-day on a crisp packet. The things they'll put on food to make it more interesting, right?
Besides giving me a deep rooted craving for Monster Munch, it also gave me something to think about for the majority of the day. According to the crisp packet, 5 things that'll without a doubt keep your spirits high are:
- A good strong cup of coffee
- A bit of battered cod
- A snooze after lunch
- A decent pint
- A bag of proper English crisps.
Forget 5 portions of fruit and veg a day, we're not rabbits. I'm all for embracing this alternative five a day. Like I said though, it's been playing on my mind all day, purely because I've been wondering if 5 simple things have the ability to keep my spirits high, 24/7.
I have issues with the list the crisp packet suggests because:
a) I'm not a huge fan of coffee
b) Battered cod is definitely not what I consider 'comfort food'
c) Snoozing after lunch would make it very awkward at work...
d) A pint a day would make us all very gas-y and that's not pretty.
e) I have no issue with the crisps. I agree that crisps are quite good.

While that list works for every English man who lives by the sea and has a penchant for real ale, it doesn't sit comfortably with me.
In my world, my 5-a-day would run like this:
- An orgasm, AT LEAST once a day.
- A fishfinger sandwich, with plastic cheese and ketchup.
- 3 bottles of Mixed Fruit OR Strawberry & Lime Koppaberg
- 60 minutes of laughing AND girl talk with my favourite girls
- A nice walk along the beach

If my list was made accessible to pretty much every single person on the planet, I'm 109% certain that the world would be a much happier place...

What would you say are your 5-a-days, if you have one? Tell me, tell me, tell me!


  1. Absolutely LOVE this post, really made me chuckle! My 5-a-day would be...

    -An orgasm, at least once a day.
    -A decent pint.
    -A cheeky kiss with an attractive man.
    -An indepth chinwag with one of the ladies in my life.
    -A slice of marmite on toast.

    BAM Xx

  2. - An orgasm, AT LEAST once a day.
    - A plate of Nutella on toast.
    - A movie, chocolate & wine night in with the gals.
    - An hour's worth of laughter and cheeky conversation.
    - Half an hour of doing whatever the fuck you want.

    LOVE this post way too much. xxx

  3. haha I love your blogs. This one is one of your best; light hearted and fun.
    I have to say your fish finger sarnie sounds yuk (sorry)
    Mine would be

    - Time for prayer to give thanks
    - Writing and singing
    - Time spent with my husband, family and friends
    - walking my dogs in the park
    - laying in the sunshine and dreaming of the future